Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Waxing Your Wood Diminishes Blog Addiction

Question:

What can you prescribe for a case of serious Blog withdrawal? You see, I used to have this advice site (*LOVE* your new format, by the way) but life got in the way. Now I'm reduced to living in real time, talking live with people right there in front of me? What's a propeller head to do?

Answer:

First of all Andrew...er...propeller head, it's wonderful to hear from you. We were all saddened by the demise of the wonderful advice column you penned for such a long time. You can find some comfort knowing that many of your fans/clients/friends suffer right along side you as you continue to make your way through cyber addiction withdrawl symptoms. (Use caution if you visit this site...You may end up with some real good advice that will be honest, truthful and cheap)

Keeping your hands busy during the hours you would normally have spent sitting at your keyboard typing endless advice (I'm assuming you did ths during the evening hours after work) is key in your recovery.

I have a suggestion for you that might just take your mind off the missing key strokes.

First off, I think physical release is a priority when pent up tension begins to painfully rear it's ugly head leaving you feeling... well... let's just call it...blue.

Waxing your wood can go along way in getting that pinched, painful, sour look that has taken over your face to diminish if even if only for a few hours. DISTRACTION is the key!

Use warm or cool oil depending on how sensitive your skin is. ((I would suggest it be more on the warm side so that some of its pleasant aroma penetrates the air around you and helps set the mood for this often unilateral task)).

Place a few drops of oil at the point that undergoes the most use and begin to rub gently. Increase the speed of the rubbing if you want immediate satisfaction or continue to rub slowly for a longer, more impactful resolution.

Once you immerse yourself in this pleasant chore, the tension you have been feeling so omnipresent in your life without blogging, will slowly begin to fade into your sub-conscience. This new sense of self-satisfaction will take your mind off your previous addiction and might even leave you with a smile on your face. ((Depending on what brand of oil you use, you should also experience a new softer skin texture on your hand)).

It is also very likely that your wife ((who usually does not have the benefit of watching you perform this solitary act)) will be so thrilled that you have taken one of the mundane chores off her plate, having waxed all the wood in the house, that you will likely be rewarded with a roll in the hay.

It's a win-win situation propeller head.

Dr. J

63 comments:

Sandee said...

How clever of you Dr. J. You had me going there and I was in a completely different place. I like how you think! Have a great weekend.

jbwritergirl said...

I see your mind was in the gutter this morning Comedy. Sorry to burst your bubble. Have you started waxing yet?
Dr. J

Andrew McAllister said...

Thanks Dr. J! I'm feeling less withdrawn already :o)

Best of luck with this new format!

Andrew

Unknown said...

When I aint blogging... I am usually waxing some pears.

Later Y'all

jbwritergirl said...

Sounds like you've got a lot of balls Melon! HeHe!

jbwritergirl said...

...and Andrew...You must know how missed you are in cyberworld. I'm sure you will be back sooner or later.

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