Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Question Questions

QUESTION

I am a teacher and try to ask my students questions that they can intuitively answer. They are usually about things they see in every day life. Is there a way to avoid getting answers that are given by students who are extremely perceptive?

ANSWER

Children today live in a much more open society. They see and hear things that we're not aware that they're picking up on as witnessed by the following story. One teacher blindfolded one of her students and popped a Hershey's Kiss into his mouth then asked him...

"What does a kiss taste like?" she asked. "Do you know what it is?"

"No, I don't," said the little boy.

'Okay, I'll give you a clue," she said. "It's the thing your daddy wants from your Mom before he goes to work."

Suddenly, a little girl at the back of the room yelled "Spit it out you idiot, it's a piece of ass!"

Saturday, July 5, 2008

Child Labor

Question

My child has expressed an interest in getting a job. Although his is still very young, seven, we are wondering if it would benefit him to join the workforce early enough to allow him to discover where his talents lay.

Answer

By all means. Give him the car keys and shove him out the door. Okay, so I'm just kidding because obviously he is not tall enough to see over the dash yet, however, a car booster seat could be the answer.

It is never too early to start your children on the road to riches. Many of the jobs that will be available to this younger generation have not yet even been created so it is wise to start looking around to see what their adaptability is like.

A perfect example of how it works and how much your child can get out of early employment and learn to deal with all sorts of situations can be seen in the story below.

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A young family moved into a house, next to a vacant lot. One day, a construction crew began to build a house on the empty lot.

The young family's 5-year-old daughter naturally took an interest in the goings-on and spent much of each day observing the workers.

Eventually the construction crew, all of them 'gems-in-the-rough,' more or less, adopted her as a kind of project mascot. They chatted with her during coffee and lunch breaks, and gave her little jobs to do here and there to make her feel important.

At the end of the first week, they even presented her with a pay envelope containing ten dollars. The little girl took this home to her mother who suggested that she take her ten dollars 'pay' she'd received to the bank the next day to start a savings account.

When the girl and her mom got to the bank, the teller was equally impressed and asked the little girl how she had come by her very own pay check at such a young age. The little girl proudly replied, 'I worked last week with a real construction crew building the new house next door to us.'

"Oh my goodness gracious," said the teller, "and will you be working on the house again this week, too?"

The little girl replied, "I will, if those assholes at Home Depot ever deliver the fuckin' drywall..."

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What this child received from this experience is priceless. Not only is she learning to bank her money, she is also on the fast track to learning a new language. I say go for it. What's the little bastard got to loose?